on the way to perfection (a preface)

first and foremost, i would like to express my deepest gratitude to everyone who have set aside some of their precious time to read my callow short fiction. especially on top of this list of gratitude are the people who have spent even more time to point out the careless and awkward sentence constructions that i have incurred. constructive criticisms and comments are always appreciated and i thank you for helping me grow as a writer.

moving forward, i would like to explain the popular comment of the use of verbose (bombastic) words in my little essay. the obvious reason to this is because i am currently preparing for an absurd yet intense graduate school entrance examination, the infamous GRE. this exam tests the brightest of minds on the depths of their vocabulary as well as their mathematical skills. in the event that one of these sharp minds manages to achieve a perfect score, answering all questions correctly, he/she would still be able to obtain only a score of 96% to balance the general test-taker's bell curve. THAT, in my opinion, is why the examination is absurd. in addition to the exam, i found that i have a profound fascination to deepen the depths of my vocublary (as deep as the marinara trench i hope!). thus, i actually find all this learning and improving enjoyable. also, on the issue of writing without caps, of course i know sentences start with capital letters but this is my writing space, my respite from work, i wish to keep it the way i like it. maybe, maybe in the future, if/when i write for a publication, i would conform to this rule of writing.

in writing Perfection, i began the first sentence without any idea of how it would end. the main theme of the story, however, had always been there from the start and then skulking like a shadowy figure throughout the story until the very end. this theme, is of course as many of you have picked up from reading, of shallowness and greed. i feel that these elements have plagued humanity since the dawn of time. from the display of brute strength (shallowness) to win potential mates to digging for precious metals as a symbol of power and status (greed) eventually leading to countries warring with one another for even more metals and other precious commodities such as spices/land space/oil. shallowness leads to greed which is so prevalent in everyone of us. each of us are greedy to varying degrees and all of us strive for perfection, always never satisfied, be it the student who wants to score a perfect A, the mother who struggles to provide the perfect life for her child or the monk who strives for perfection through nirvana.

the second point that i wanted to put across is affluence and wealth. despite the billions of people living in extreme poverty, a quarter of the world is living the wonderful comfortable life people a hundred years ago could never have imagined. they are so comfortable that the slightest degree change in the temperatures of their homes or the minute presence of minerals in their drinking water elicits a spiteful response (often leading to serious lawsuits) toward the people/companies in charge of providing them their comfort. although the average person in the 21st century is wealthier by more than 10 folds of the average person in the 20th century, human greed can never be assuaged. take for example the need for gas and oil in the 20th century that has raised the status of these fuels as "black gold". rising affluence around the globe improves human lives but it has also degraded the other life forms sharing the planet with us; which brings us to the third theme of my story.

expanding on the previous issue, i moved on to briefly mention the issues afflicting the natural world. being the topic that i myself am most passionate, i felt that i did not address it as much as i would like to. but evidently, the story is itself is not about global warming or loss of habitat, so being able to sneak these into a concise story less than a few pages long is good enough for me. i still cringe when i think about the visually gory footage of the chinese literally skinning their domisticated animals alive, dumping these naked, still breathing creatures onto the back of a truck while keeping the blood-drenched skin and fur aside as if the animal's hides are more precious than the animal itself. i wonder how humans can be so shallow and cruel, torturing and tormenting these creatures for the sake of keeping their precious product pels intact without a single thought for the pain that the animals go through before they die. pelts, that are to be used in the fashion industry, are the heart and soul of this story.

drawing from the responses and support, i will definitely write more stories in an effort to improve. i have already taken in all of your praises and criticisms to start on a journey towards writing better. in both the literal and figurative senses, this story is me on my way to writing perfection.

perfection

she clicked the "checkout" button on the screen of her computer without any hint of hesitance. this time, 3 days from now, the screen on the monitor states that the moleskin gucci purse would arrive at the harrington place. ms. kimberly was ecstatic. the prospect of a new item of beauty arriving to add to her splendor is euphoria. such fervid emotions quickly caused her to be predictably restive. anticipation coupled with anxiety and impatience for the object to arrive, she strolled back and forth her room staring all the time at the mirror on the wall where a reflection of her haughty face consisting of a pair of blue exotic almond-shaped eyes and a sharp hooked nose stares back into the room nonchalantly. her lucious lips is perfect, never without the addition of an exceptionally glossy pink lipstick. even her cephalid features are flawless as blond streaks of hair flow towards the pair of well-groomed sharp elfin ears. although she portrays a supercilious demeanor it is often a facade of her naturally sanguine face.

this time though, neither arrogance nor cheerfulness is apparent on her face. she simply could not wait for the purse to arrive. pirouetting from the mirror on the wall, she walked towards a sophisticated 3-level closet that contains hundred of clothing articles. on one side of the closet is a small panel that gives you the feeling that you are operating an airplane with its many buttons. one of these, when pressed, causes the closet to rotate revealing a different side of the closet that contains even more of her superfluous designer collections. she decided to put on her favorite halter top as she grabs the keys to her car in one of the nooks of the closet.

arriving at her favorite mall barely three miles away, she quickly walked through the arched entrances to the commercial and fashion heaven of the 21st century. The 8th Wonder of the World was not only a heaven for shoppers around the globe, it was a giant. standing as the largest man-made building in the short history of humanity, its total volume spans well over a million square feet. the sheer size of this building dwarfs even the largest aircraft hangar. it is the epitome, the culmination of the insatiable human hunger for material wealth. every year, millions all around the globe visit its famous silver archetypal buttresses which lined the entire building from the outside propping up the dome-shaped structure. its raised vestibule along with a giant plasma screen in between the arched doorway of the main entrance is a sure sign of the rising affluence of all the people around the globe.

it is only natural for ms. kimberly to be living at the heart of the fashion center of the world. as the only daughter of a billionaire and an aspiring fashion designer, she requested, no, insisted that her father buys her a penthouse at the very top of the posh harrington place positioned just next to the 8th wonder. ever since moving in last january, she has been on a shopping spree, obtaining new garments. her sedulity of the constantly changing fashion never falters. she would often shop with her wealthy friends but even these affluent companions find it hard to keep up with her insatiable hunger for fashion. it has become an obsession.

as she enters the mall, a looped recording of the mall announcement for donation to the charity of eliminating global warming elicited a smug smile from ms. kimberly. she knows that her father, an oil-tycoon frequently donates to the cause of reducing global warming but yet ironically, he is the one who caused the problem in the first place. to her though, she could not care less. to her, trees and plants are for cotton and linen while animals are for wool and pelts.

with haunting elegance and grace, she took the escalator up and walked to her favorite department store. an overly convivial store assistant greeted her as she entered the store but she nonchalantly yet at the same time maintaining an air of pride waved him away. he scurried away like a sewer rat scuttling from the blinding light. in his place, the store manager arrived promptly.

"what would you like to have on your lovely self, today ms. kimberly?" he had said. he knew her. of course, who wouldn't know ms. kimberly? the obnoxious, the rude, the arrogant daughter of an american billionaire oil tycoon.

"ask that once more and i will have you joining the increasing number of the jobless. i have told you before and i will tell you one last time. my body only deserves the best, so bring out the most expensive and newest article that you have in your joke of a shop," she castigated in reply with malice dripping on each of her word.

the manager took flight and within a minute returned with a ten-thousand dollar dress made by hand from a famous designer. she lambasted the quality of the design and her querulous tirade went on for a good couple of minutes before she finally bought the dress. she bought it not because she liked it but because she wishes to own the most expensive fashion and her selfish self would not allow anyone else to compete with her for this.

store managers know about this particular obsession. they each know that if they can survive her diatribe long enough, they would be able to make sales worth a month's fortune. all except for one store manager who has a deep resentment for the pampered child. and it was on one fateful day that ms. kimberly decided to visit this manager's store for her shopping indulgence. the encounter started off with her customary derisive remarks but as soon as the manager told her that he has what it takes to make her the most beautiful person in the world, she was immediately enthralled. he had promised to make her perfect. what's more, he even promised that he can help her overcome aging altogether, that she would never have wrinkles and her face would remain as it is 100 years from now! all she had to do was to follow him to the back of the shop where there is a modern factory that makes the clothings and other oddities.

with utmost obedience characteristic of a child promised an ice cream treat, ms. kimberly walked apace, all thoughts of pride thrown aside, into the back of the shop. it was fairly dark but quite visible with the light shining through the door from the front of the shop. inside, a myriad of half-complete dresses hung on the shelves. several half manequin heads were laid out next to some of the dresses. above it all a word carved in gold and red at the far end of the wall spelled "Perfection", the name of the shop she was in. as she was looking from side to side, settling down on her initial excitement of the promised flawlesness, she began to open her mouth to demand for her promise but it was too late.

she was being pushed towards the human-shaped cast she saw earlier. she struggled and pushed with all her might but it served no purpose. her frail slim body could not defy the stalwart arms of the store manager. as she approached the cast, she realized that it was not a cast at all, but a half-open manequin and she was being forced into the manequin. in the split second she was struggling, she also saw that the word Perfection was not really coated in gold and red paint but rather, red bloodstains. at last, she was forced within the confines of the manequin and the manager promptly brought the other side of the manequin to close.

the last ms. kimberly heard of the outside world was a lock clicking as the manager secured the manequin.

the last the world heard of ms. kimberly was her muffled screams from within the manequin.

the promise that the manager initially made to ms. kimberly was upheld. she was indeed perfect and would not age a single day.

life in a nutshell

an article that i recently came across pointed out something really obvious. here's a single line from the article that was as obvious as an elephant found in the middle of downton los angeles yet i could not have figured it out on my own if not for this article; "the average person, if he /she travels once a year for vacation, would only go to 50 places at most in their lifetime". this fact smacked right across my face and questions flared at every corner of my brain. would i want to be that person who gets to visit only 50 places (most probably less) throughout his entire life? continue being the average californian and after 5 years, return to become the average malaysian?

the answer is, no. i want to see the world through the lens of my eyes, not the lens of a camera. i want to see, hear, smell, feel the animals and plants, not just watch them on a flat digital screen. i want to use the fifth sensory organ to taste the different cultures of the world through the food that they routinely eat. that is what the heart truly wants. but does the heart always get what it wants?

the brain on the other hand has issues of its own that require answers. what of my family? my parents that have spent a fortune just so that they can grow old to see their second son grow up into living a comfortable life just like everyone else. just like everyone else. the typical malaysian chinese mentality is to work hard and do well in school ( didn't do well), earn full scholarship (didn't earn one), go to college work hard and do well (didn't do so well), get out of college and work really really REALLY hard (not working really really REALLY hard, the fact supported as i'm writing this in my bleak little cubicle instead of validating) and finally when you have worked so hard all your life, with "tons of money" you can now settle down and start a family, living a supposed prosperous life. the problem is, after you've "settled down", you have to work even harder just to be able to feed the extra mouths that suddenly appear in your life.

prosperous? maybe. but isn't life all about living it to the fullest? in my remaining years here on the planet, i want to experience and absorb all there is to absorb. immersing myself in the endless sea of wonders and discovering new and fascinating facts about the world around us is definitely a fulfilling life. one might argue that life with a family is eniching and fulfilling. in many ways, i concur but is that all there is to life? with so much the world has to offer, most of us still succumb to the trappings of the corporate life. spending, no wasting away 40 precious hours of each week in a dreary building just to earn material wealth.

prosperous? no. preposterous more like it. to me, life is definitely more than carving a name for yourself in the modern jungle. it is, i opine with conviction, more than gaining riches to live a "comfortable" life because you will never be comfortable if you have to keep climbing the corporate ladder 8 hours a day and never being able to see more than 50 places in your lifetime. it is even more than just having a family to go home to. sure, family life is another one of those must-have life experiences but how about bringing the family along for the adventure? of course, it would not be fair to the little one, deciding for him / her to a life of travel instead of the city lifestyle we are all stuck in.

another concern that my trusty old brain decided to ponder upon is this; what happens when you are old and you are not able physically to travel to see the world anymore and you do not even have the material wealth to live out the rest of your life comfortably because you decided to leave the hectic lackluster working life about 40 years ago? maybe the sons and the daughters will take care of you. but if you bring them along for the adventure, they are definitely not going to be able to do so much less take care of themselves. maybe you will be like ol' Carl Fredricksen , the old chap from the brilliantly crafted cartoon that is UP, strong at heart is all you need to be strong physically. nonetheless, the bare truth is that it does not matter for when i look back i would have seen that i have led a fulfilling life. at least i have been to more than 50 places. at least i have tasted so many culinary wonders even the most opportunistic raccoon pales in comparison in a competition based on gourmet explorations. at least i have experienced the world. that in itself is more than enough reason for me to let go of life itself in the end because isn't that what life is all about? living life to the fullest, experiencing as much as possible before your time is up. our lives here in this world are certainly timed, as if someone up there is playing a cruel joke on each and everyone of us by starting and stopping the stopwatch whenever they feel like it or when the timer is up.

there you have it, life in a nutshell.

oh and i have to add, nutshell in life, on the other hand, means to live in a nutshell, to be shielded by the nut (city / corporate boring life) from all that the world has to offer.

should i live in the nutshell and conform to society? or should i crack it open, leave it and partake on an adventure that will fatten up my passport with countless stamps and stapled visas?